Monday, November 21, 2011

In Defense

One of the things that has been bugging me lately is the way that girls have decided to view guys their age.
Now, don't get me wrong. I think boys are weird. Teenagers in particular are icky, and they can be incredibly annoying.
However.

I have recently talked with some lovely OYANers who have claimed that it's worse for a guy to be mean to a girl than it is vice versa. I personally disagree with this, for the simple fact that it's not like the guys aren't affected by it.

One of the reasons that people consider me to be a weirdo is the fact that I do talk to boys. The other night I was at a movie night, and in the time between the two movies we watched, we took a break. What ended up happening?
Well, all of the girls except for me disappeared upstairs, and I was left hanging out with the guys. The woman whose house we were at- and who runs the teen group- came down a few minutes later and asked, "Who are we missing down here?" meaning, specifically, who are the people who left to go upstairs and talk about pointless anime and paranormal romance novels?
The answer came from one of the guys.
You are probably curious at this point as to what he said.
Want to know?
"All the girls."
Of course, this was quickly ammended by some people because of the weird look that Zsuzsanna (the teen group leader) gave them after they said that.

My personal theory on why they didn't count me as being "one of the girls" is because I'm not in their little "girl clique". Actually, I'm not in any of the cliques, but I guess that's beside the point.
Anyway, like I was saying. I'm not in the girl clique. I don't consider all guys to be pointless, rude, too dumb for words, or even so icky I can't talk to them. Actually, I've found that they're often better at listening than girls are, they're easier to talk to, I can relate to them better, and, frankly, they aren't as mean as most girls I know.
Interesting, right?

Now that I've showed that I actually tend to be friends with guys more easily than girls, let's get back to the original subject.

How girls think of guys.

Like I said before, don't get me wrong. Guys are icky. They always have been, they probably always will. I'm not saying that that's wrong. I'm not even saying that they're better than girls. All I'm saying is that they're a lot better than most girls my age say they are.

Sexism is defined as "discrimination on the basis of sex, esp of men against women". Now, this does not say "discrimination against women". This says "discrimination on the basis of sex". Of course it mentions "especially of men against women", but that's not the only definition.

You could consider most girls I know to be sexist.

The people I've talked to recently claim that it's worse when a guy is mean to a girl than when a girl is mean to a guy. They have quoted a Bible verse at me, saying that women were given to men, and are therefore men's to protect and cherish and all that, and therefore it's worse when a guy is mean to a girl than vice versa. Now, I'm not saying that this Bible verse is not supporting them.
I'm just saying that their stance is not agreeable to mine.

My opinion is that it's bad when a guy is mean to a girl, and it's equally bad when a girl is mean to a guy.

Let me take a moment here and define what my definition is of "mean".

Cruel remarks, gestures, words, et cetera. Talking behind person's back. Insulting them. Considering them to be inferior to yourself. Being physically abusive. (Really physical abusive. Not just whacking someone gently when they're goofing off.) Etc.

Is it worse when a guy is mean to a girl? Well, obviously, it can be more painful. Especially if we're talking physical abuse.
But how about words?
To tell the truth, most girls I know are better at ignoring insults than the guys I know. We're better at just shrugging and saying, "oh well" than they are.
So is it worse?

2 comments:

Rose said...

right. the short answer is "i dont know". the long answer is "girls are much more verbally insulting/abusive/cruel. they say things - sharp, mean things - that, frankly, guys could never come up with."
but i still dont know.

catriona said...

I agree with you completely, it's definetly just as bad when a girl in mean to a guy. At my school girls and guys kinda treat each other equally as mean though :P

I wish I could be friends with guys, but I just freeze up when I try to talk to them because I think "wait! they're a guy!!" I only have 1 guy friend, but he's awesome :)