If so, The Guide is for you!
On sale now for only $999.99, The Guide will solve every problem that you encounter*! It will teach you to avoid answering questions you don't want to answer, and it will provide a useful guide to secondhand sales! BUY YOUR GUIDE NOW!
This is a LAST CHANCE OFFER. Buy now and we will throw in an extra pair of underwear AND a toothbrush, FREE OF CHARGE!
Call 555-555-5555 Now to claim this great deal!
*The Guide does not claim to clean your room, feed the dogs, mop the floor, or save you when skydiving. Please consult a doctor before use. Side effects may include: Vomiting, awesomeness, exhaustion, cancer, and death. Please use at your own risk.
Chapter 7: How To Wake Up Early And Stay Awake
Chances are good that you've had to wake up early before. You probably woke up to your alarm, shut it off, fell back asleep, and then woke up again an hour later, late for whatever appointment you had to wake up early for. It's a common problem that plagues most humans. Here at The Guide, we're dedicated to waking up early. We've developed a stash of secret tips for waking up early and staying awake, and we've developed a comprehensible plan for you, the reader, to follow.
Step one: Go to sleep on time.
It's amazing how many people do not follow this rule. If you need to wake up early, go to sleep earlier as well if at all possible. A good way to decide when to go to sleep is to follow the seven hour rule: If you need to wake up at seven, go to sleep by midnight. If you need to wake up at five, aim to be in bed by ten. This way you'll get enough sleep to deal with the next day.
Step Two: Set Your Alarm
If you have a choice of alarm sounds, go for one that is loud, preferably a song or sound that you like, and one that doesn't make you want to fall asleep again. For example, we find it easier to wake up to Icon For Hire's "Make A Move", or Skillet's "Whispers In The Dark", than something more low key like Five For Fighting's "100 Years".
Step Three: Get Things Set Up
After setting your alarm but before going to sleep, get everything set out for yourself tomorrow. Choose your outift and lay it out, get your favored method of music (iPod, MP3 player, internet, radio, CD player, etc.) set up for the next morning (See step four), and make sure you have a way to reach a light source from your bed.
Step Four: Listen To Music
After waking up in the morning, start listening to music as soon as possible. Listen to something that makes you want to get up and get stuff done, or at least something that prevents you from falling back asleep. Start a CD player, or listen to your MP3 player. The music will make you stay awake.
Step Five: Turn On Lights
Do not let yourself stay in a dark room! Turn on a light, preferably a bright one that lights up your room. Dont slowly turn on lights to give your eyes time to adjust, just turn them on. The light will help your body realize it's time to be awake, and will prevent you from falling back asleep.
Step Six: Get Ready
Get dressed. Take a shower. Brush your teeth. Put on your makeup, if applicable. In any way, get ready for your day, probably still listening to music for as long as you can and always in light. By now you should definitely feel awake, and the chances for falling back asleep are slim. Still, don't let yourself lay in bed, but keep on your feet as much as posisble.
By the end of step six you will be more or less awake, and you are most likely going to remain so. Just follow these six steps, modifying them to suit your individual needs and environments, and you'll be staying awake after waking up early like a pro!