Surviving November

See, I was going to write a list of tips for surviving NaNoWriMo for the participant, but then I realized. Not only is this overused, not very helpful, and already done by hundreds of NaNoers, but it's also prejudiced against the other percentage of the world.

So, here you go. This is honor of you, supporters. You put up with our whining, complaining, moaning and groaning and carrying on, our constant word counts, our ranting about our books, our demands to read what we've written, our obsession with cookies around this time of the year, and our excitement when our characters actually do something.
Thank you.

How To Survive November When You Know A NaNoWriMoer or Two:

Treat Us Like a Noob.

Yes. That's N-O-O-B, not N-E-W-B. That is, I'm using the more mean version. Why? Because we probably deserve it. After updating you on our word counts every hundred words, after ranting, after insisting that you read our cruddy first drafts- with no plot- you have every right to treat us like a noob. That is to say, as I told my friend, "Just smile, nod, and thank God you aren't as annoying." 

'Nuff said.

Find Something Just as Annoying.

That is to say- find a hobby, stick to that hobby, and start insisting that we listen to you talk about it. Chances are we won't get the hint that we're that annoying, but it helps blow off steam.

We're The Chosen One.

Look here.

'Nuff said.

Be Overly Enthusiastic.

I can't tell you what's more annoying than having someone update you every time their characters do something more exciting than waking up and going to sleep... But a close second, or a tie, is being overly enthusiastic about that fact. As in:

NaNoer: JADE JUST GOT IN A CAR CRASH! AAGHEG! I'M SO PROUD!

NoNaNoer: THAT'S FANTASTIC! CONGRATULATIONS! I'M SO PROUD OF YOU! I THINK YOU NEED TO CELEBRATE! EAT CANDY! THAT'S JUST EPIC! WE SHOULD HAVE A FRICKIN' PARTY FOR HER! WOW! AMAZING! GOOD JOB! THAT'S THE MOST EXCITING THING I'VE HEARD ALL DAY!

... You get the idea.

Give Candy If You Can.

Or other food. Having our mouth full and our fingers sticky just means that there really is no way that we can communicate our love of pointless word counts, unless you and the NaNoer know sign language. In that case... A lollipop?

Rant About It To Other NaNoers.

No. Really. Thankfully I know how annoying it is when people constantly update you on stuff, or I would be one of those ignorant NaNoers who enjoy updating you every time they so much as blink. However, if I weren't, I can guarantee that being told how annoying someone else is about that would definitely make me shut up. (So, this also works too if X is the person being annoyed and Y is the person being annoying, and X starts ranting about B- also a NaNoer- to Y, even though she's really just wanting Y to shut up, not B, because B is not annoying. It's a nice way of saying, 'stop it. You're driving me crazy, and since I'm already the mayor of Crazy Town, I don't need any more insanity in my life!'"

Know That You Are Awesome.

I probably don't know you. But you're probably awesome nevertheless. And knowing that you are, in all honesty, awesome, funny, smart, epic, pretty/handsome, and otherwise capable of a lot will help you. It can let you lean back in your computer chair and think, "Bravo. Your character just managed to kill someone. Good job. And you're writing 50,000 words in a month. I'm not. But you know what? I'm epic. So HA." and then delete the email/text/whatever.