Why I Nearly had a Mental Breakdown at Jewel the Other Day.

Angela stood in front of the refrigerated section, starting at the cheeses.
"Just find the refrigerated, Pillsbury rolls, okay?" her mom asked, handing her a coupon. "Get either the loaves or the bread sticks. I'm planning to have them and some soup for lunch one day."
Angela could barely nod her head. "Alright... Alright..." She glanced at her mom. "Where are they...?"
"They should be down there."
Angela nodded, and walked down toward the refrigerators where her mother had motioned. Scanning the shelves, she didn't see any of the iconic blue tubes that she knew held pre-made, refrigerated dough, made for lazy housewives and cooking-impaired dads who just wanted to get the food done for heavens sake.
"This cannot be happening," Angela muttered. She rubbed her head and tried to stop sweating. "Not this... Not after earlier..."
She flashed back about half an hour to when she, her mother, and her sister Monica had been leaving Michael's. She hadn't felt any better then, either.
"It's not like Monica's talking helped."
She remembered walking down the aisles at Michael's with her overly talkative little sister, trying to find the 'Jumbo bag of mixed buttons'. Not only had it been a complete and total failure, but she had to endure her sister's talking, which included things along the lines of, "Angela! Angela look! Leaves! Real leaves! Are those real leaves? Angela! ARE THOSE REAL LEAVES!" as they passed the fake flowers, or, "I don't want to hold your hand! Glue. Why is there glue? Is that glue? That's glue. Angela!" as they passed the foam aisle.
Angela blinked, the odd stare of a passer waking her from her dream.
"...Crud," she muttered, as her task came back to mind. "Dough... Crap... I don't see it..." She muttered under her breath. "Mommy.." She wiped at her eyes and tried to ignore the prickling sensation behind them. She felt very hot, and the world was starting to blur. The sounds of people talking and bickering seemed to reach all time high levels in her ears, and she felt tempted to sit down and start crying. She would have, too, if she had even felt a bit capable of movement.
"Mommy," she muttered again. "They're not here..."
Forcing her legs to move, she turned around and stumbled back down the aisle where her mom was.
"I can't find them.."

.....

There you go, folks. I didn't do a very good job describing it, but yeah. That's what happens when an introvert is over stimulated, exhausted, stressed out, and hungry.
Blurring and crying and over-emotional responses to random crap.
Moral of this story?
Do not, I repeat, DO NOT, go to a craft store and then grocery store with a 4 year old. You will regret it, and come close to possibly having a mental breakdown in the middle of Jewel.

I Was Only Four.

When the two planes crashed into those towers, when the one plane crashed into the Pentagon...
When the heroes on flight 93 decided it was better to crash their own plane into a field in Pennsylvania, rather than to let the terrorists crash it wherever they were planning to...
I was only four.

I was in the car with my mother, and with Veela, on the way to my mother's doctor appointment. (She was four months pregnant with my sister Christina.)

I don't remember a thing.

All I remember is growing up with this fear of the date "9-11", with knowing that something bad happened then.

And honestly, the only way I really knew about it at all, or remembered, was because 9-11 is what you call when you have an emergency.

I'm thankful for that number.

Even though I don't remember the people who died that day, or even that day at all, I'm glad that I grew up with knowing that something bad had happened.

Something horrible and tragic.

Ten years later, and I'm 14.

I'm not going to lie and say that I'm patriotic and that I start crying when I say the Pledge of Allegiance. I don't get overly hyped up on Fourth of July, or on any of the countless days that we celebrate (or simply remember, on the case of 9-11)...
But I love my country.

And today, I almost started crying for those people.

Imagine.

Before that day, it hadn't happened.

Kids got up. Got dressed. Brushed their teeth.
They went to school.

Adults got up. They went to work. Maybe they died in the towers, or maybe they just got scared as they stood in a McDonald's and listened to the radio.

Either way.
Imagine waking up.
Imagine answering someone "what day is it?"
And not having that drop of the stomach when you realize what day it is.

That's the most horrible part for me. It's the fact that all those people, over 3,000, got up that morning with the full expectation that they were going to live through it.

It's that those firefighters went into the building knowing they were going to die.

And all those people who fought with them. Maybe someone had a teen, and they had ended badly. Maybe someone was worried they were going to get fired, or maybe they had just had bad news themselves.
A car crash.
Cancer.

But after that, it didn't matter anyway.

Sorry for the rambling post. It's kind of pointless, but I just wanted to do something for 9-11. I don't remember, but I remember.
I didn't ever know, but I can't forget, either.
I wasn't ever hating those people who did it, but I have to forgive them.

I pledge allegiance to the flag
Of the United States of America.
And to the republic,
For which it stands,
One nation,
Under God,
Indivisible,
With liberty and justice for all.

Pictures

Hello, salutations, heyza, hola, bonjour, konnichiwa... And so forth...

Last Monday my family went to "Cake on the Lake", which is basically this big party that's held at lake Michigan, by the rest of my family. It's a tradition... And it's fun...
Yeah.
And it's in September.

Usually, that isn't actually a problem. I mean, it's slightly chilly, but it's usually definitely warm enough you can walk around the beach in a swimsuit and go swimming, and it's not like, "WOW it's cold..."
Uh uh.
This time it was really frigid, and there were huge waves. (Huge waves = huge riptide = not safe), so no one went into the actual lake.

Pity.

Instead, we all huddled around a fire, and buried ourselves under blankets.
And wrestled on the sand.
Fun times.
(Except that my neck/back still hurts... Urgh.)

It was really weird, though, because we stuck our feet in the water, and the water was warmer than the air... Which NEVER happens... So that was really strange.

Either way, I have a few pictures from CotL that my stalker friends will all wanna take a look at. (*cough*Sheila*cough*)

And one more note before the picture-age.. Well... Two..

1. Yes, we are actually at the beach, that isn't just a dropcloth behind us.
2. Let me mention that when I say "the rest of my family", I mean... A lot of people. About 3/4 of my first cousins, a couple of my second cousins, some aunts and uncles, my family (hey, that's 8), my grandparents on my dad's side, family friends, cousins of my cousins... Random dudes who drop by... People. Lots. And lots. Of people.

Enter the picturage.



That's me.

 

Veela. She's much more photogenic.

And Christina.

The troll- I mean... Monica.

Reason #1 why my neck hurts.

Pretty beach.

Reson #2 my neck hurts.

Squish.

Kenneth!

Veela and I trying to squish each other. Epic fail.

Random picture at the end.



There you go, stalkers of mine. Pictures. (*cough*Sheila*cough*)

How to Ignore People

Are you sick of people telling you JUST TO IGNORE THEM? Do you hate it when you need to IGNORE SOMEONE but CAN'T?
Do you suffer from the INABILITY TO IGNORE whoever you want to?
Have you found yourself ANSWERING THE PERSON even though you swore you would ignore them?
If you've answered YES to any of the above YOU NEED THIS GUIDE!
The Guide is a COMPREHENSIVE, EASY TO USE guide for all of life's problems*.
Call 123-456-7890** to buy the guide for only $69.99!
This is our EXCLUSIVE DEAL!
Don't MISS YOUR CHANCE!
LAST CHANCE OFFER!

*The Guide is not guarenteed to prevent paper cuts, save your cat from a tree, or save you from a sasquatch.
**Like I always say. Not a real number. I think. Anyone want to try it and tell me what happens? ;)

Chapter One: How to Ignore People (The Right Way)

   Chances are good that you have been told at least once in your life to "just ignore them."

   Chances are also probably good that you have either been unable to resist making a sarcastic remark to them, engaging in regular conversation, or have been unable to stop them from getting on your nerves. You probably find yourself wondering why they tell you to ignore someone... When it's obvious that ignoring someone is never going to work.

   Chances are good you've never read this chapter before.

   It is, in fact, possible to ignore someone. If you ever find yourself zoning out while your mother is lecturing you, you are ignoring her. If you ever find yourself forgetting to respond to that text message, you're (accidentally) ignoring the person.

   But how do you harness that power? How do you channel it and actually use it to ignore your annoying sister? Or that jerk who sits next to you in class? How do you prevent yourself from screaming when someone continues to bug me?

   Well, chances are it changes from person to person. But the staff here at The Guide Inc. have found a few tried and true methods of ignoring someone.

1. Think about something else. This may seem obvious, but often times we are so caught up in ignoring someone, that we aren't. So, go ahead. Completely forget that someone is sitting there. Think about how you're flunking math. Think about what you'd do if an agent randomly came up to you and told you that you were going to become an international singing sensation. Tell a story in your head. Ask yourself impossible questions (Did the chicken or the egg come first...?). Go ahead.
2. Eavesdrop. If it's at all possible, focus on someone else's conversation. If your sister and her friend are in the back seat, listen to what they're saying. If your friends are having a conversation a few feet away, try to lip-read what they're saying.
3. Observe your surroundings. If there's no one to eavesdrop on, and you can't make yourself focus on thoughts, find something to look at.  Look at a tree. "Wow. That's a green tree." It's okay to sound obvious. After all, it's just in your head.
4. Get a song stuck in your head. This is another thing to focus on. Start singing a song in your head. Hum it out loud. Just focus on the song. Choose a really catchy one. If you already have a song in your head... Great! Just focus on the song, and chances are you'll get so caught up singing in your head that you won't notice what the person is saying.

   The last tip that we can offer is to focus on what is making you zone out when your mom is talking. Figure out what it is, and use it later.

   Have fun ignoring people...

   If you were even paying attention to this chapter, that is.