Especially from 3-6 pm.
It may help that we have a 99c latte at that time.
Maybe.
I dunno.
But anyway, we have these lattes. The thing is, though, is that whenever we have a customer, the order usually goes as thus.
Me: Hi, how can I help you?
Customer: I'd like a medium latte, mocha, with skim milk.
Me: Hot or iced?
Customer: Uhhhhhhhhhh
...
...
...
...
customer: Which one's better?
Really?
I work at the stupid shop, like I'm allowed to say anything other than "they're both excellent?" So why are you even asking? And why didn't you think of this before you ordered?
Eventually they'll make up their mind. Usually the hot latte people have no issue, but then there's the iced latte people.
Let me tell you; iced latte people are either really nice or REALLY picky and have no idea what they're even doing.
Like seriously some of these people I don't think should be allowed to go through the drive through.
Actually, scratch that.
I don't think some of these people should be allowed to order a latte.
Or a coffee.
Or anything.
They'll order something ridiculous like "white chocolate mocha heavy on the mocha" and we'll make it. A cup of ice, add the espresso, add the syrups, add the milk, add whipped cream, and then any of the toppings (mocha or caramel syrups on top) and then give it to them.
Wanna know what half of them say?
"Isn't that too small?"
Uh no, you did order a small.
"Why is there whipped cream?"
BECAUSE THAT'S HOW WE MAKE IT. IT'S ON THE STUPID PICTURE. IF YOU DON'T WANT WHIPPED CREAM, THEN SAY "no whipped cream please" AND THAT'S COOL IT'S LESS WORK FOR US ANYWAY.
"But this isn't what I wanted... Isn't a latte just iced coffee?"
You're kidding me.
Just iced coffee?
A latte has espresso and milk.
An iced coffee is, let's see, COFFEE WITH ICE.
Goodness me.
"This has the caramel/mocha/pumpkin/white chocolate/vanilla/whatever, right?"
No I just thought we'd mess up your order on purpose
OF COURSE IT DOES.
If we're unsure, we'll ask you at the window what flavor.
I don't even know what half of these people think they're getting. Let me show you the picture that we put on all the menus.
See that?
They. Have. Whipped. Cream.
They. Have. Syrups.
They. Are. NOT. COFFEES.
I just.
I don't even.
And then today, we had this lady go through the drive through. Our conversation, to my recollection, went as thus:
Me: Hi, how can I help you?
Woman: I'd like four of the ninety nine cent lattes.
(author's note: We only do two per customer.)
Me: Uhhhh okay
Woman: Caramel. Four. Hot.
(only, when she said "hot" it definitely sounded like she said "iced" so.)
Me: ...Okay.
(Meanwhile, my coworker is starting the FOUR lattes.)
Woman: *pulls up to window*
Me: Um, by the way, the coupon only works for two per customer.
Woman: Well my friend's in the car. So there's two of us. *glares at me*
Okay okay fine lady
Me: Okay....
*money transactions*
Me: Could you please pull forward to the next window?
She did that, and we finished up the four caramel lattes.
So then I brought it up to the window.
AND THEN SHE WAS LIKE
"But I want HOT LATTES NOT ICED. I SAID HOT. D:<"
So we had to go back and remake everything which took way too long because to make a hot latte you need to steam the milk
*facepalm*
Finally I gave her her stupid lattes and had to pretend I was feeling all sorry I'd messed it all up when in reality I was just glad she was finally leaving.
The only upside to this story is that my coworkers and I then drank the mistake lattes.
Yum.
Here's my friendly advice to you people:
KNOW WHAT YOU WANT BEFORE YOU ORDER.
kthxbai
So we're making the iced lattes, right? And then
